Celiwe Ndaba, a young South African doctor, has stunned social media users after bravely opening up about the financial abuse she suffered in her marriage.
Despite being a successful medical professional, Ndaba said she was constantly pressured to fund her husband’s lavish lifestyle, including his obsession with owning a Mercedes Benz.
She revealed that she took out hefty loans to finance the luxury car, a decision she now calls the “worst of her life.”
The financial strain, she said, left her and her children in deep instability.
According to BBC, Ndaba in a raw series of videos recorded from her car en route to work, detailed the toxic relationship that pushed her to the edge, both emotionally and financially.
When she pleaded with her husband to consider a more affordable car, he lashed out. He accused her of humiliating him, claiming she wanted to turn him into “a laughing stock by making him drive a small car”.
Eventually, the pressure became unbearable. Dr Ndaba ended the marriage and reclaimed her maiden name, walking away from the man who had once vowed to love and protect her.
Her honesty struck a nerve. Social media exploded with messages of support, particularly from women who had endured similar experiences while silently carrying the weight of their households.
In her candid message, Ndaba stressed that financial abuse doesn’t discriminate. “It’s not just the poor or uneducated,” she said. “Even accomplished women find themselves trapped.”
Her ex, Temitope Dada, did not respond to media requests but instead joined TikTok. In one of his first posts, he introduced himself as “Mr. Benz or nothing”, denying all allegations and posting under hashtags like #divorcetrauma.
But the public wasn’t buying it. TikTok users flooded Dr Ndaba’s page with praise for her courage, many admitting they too had suffered in silence.
“You are brave to speak out so publicly… I have been suffering in silence,” one follower wrote.
Cape Town legal expert Bertus Preller described financial abuse as a silent form of domestic violence designed to control the victim.
He explained that even highly educated women are not immune to gendered financial control.
“It is a subtle yet potent tactic of domestic violence,” he said.
Under South African law, this form of abuse is officially recognised as “economic abuse” under the Domestic Violence Act.
It includes behaviours such as denying access to money or sabotaging joint finances.
Sociologist Nombulelo Shange added that cultural expectations often force black South African women to excel both at work and at home, making them vulnerable to financial manipulation.
“Partners who feel entitled to money they didn’t earn use this as a means of control,” Shange said.